It's all semetics

A friend was just telling me about a school meeting she remembers, where a teacher was reprimanded for teaching sex education in their classroom. At the meeting, an angry parent stood up and said they didn't want their daughter in the same room as a bunch of boys while everyone was talking about their "Gentiles." Which led my friend to lean in to the person next to her and ask "What about the family Jews?"


Large, vibrantly colored flowers have popped up all over since I was last here. - And I was only "last here" a month ago! I asked a friend what they were. (Because she knows everything, and seems happy to answer my never ending questions about "What's this? And this? And that thing? And that bird!" - For which I am grateful. Everyone else shrugs and says "I dunno.")

"They're Hibiscus" she told me. "All of them."  I'd thought they looked similar, except for the colors, but there were some I hadn't realized were in the same category. "The dogs eat them all the time." She said. "They're edible."

"Your dogs eat a lot of things." I reminded her. "That doesn't automatically make something 'edible.'"

"Ok." she countered. "The dogs eat them and don't die."

She also told me that, among other things, Hibiscus are used in Red Zinger tea. They're what give the tea its "red." (I know... the rest of the world probably knew that already. Now I know too :) )

At the end of our walk, I thanked her for the two flowers she'd handed me, then held out the orange one and said "This is a Double Hibiscus." - I knew this, now, because she'd told me 15 minutes earlier. You can tell it's a Double Hibiscus because of the second layer of  petals within the first.

"Yes." she said, "And what's the other one?"

I looked at the other flower in my hand, then triumphantly thrust it forward and said "Pink!"

"Yes..." she said, "that's the color, but what kind is it?"

I looked at it again, and after a moment of pondering, I held it out again - with more authority this time - and gleefully proclaimed "- PINK!" :)

It's a "Flamingo Pink" Hibiscus

Walking your "Elder"

I've figured out how to exercise one of my relatives.

Say something that sounds like I'm talking about them on the phone -> They'll start tailing me as I continue talking and walking around the house from room to room. - I could keep it up for hours ;)

Oh sure... you say "Evil." - I say "cardiovascular workout" :)

In Flight

As I sit here on the plane, during an unusually bumpy takeoff, I am reminded of a really bad joke:

"I hope I die peacefully in my sleep, like my father. Not screaming in terror like his passengers."

I am also reminded that my Dramamine is in the overhead compartment. You know, the compartment you can't open during the flight? Not much help to me there.

Yes, I've already located the barf bag.

For anyone who's wondering, I escaped grope downs and naked X-rays so far. I'm also wearing a wireless bra. - That I remembered. But the Dramamine? That's out of reach!


* Edit: I have debated taking this down, but I'm going to leave it here for now. Things were very very difficult for me for several months. On the outside I was nice (I'm always nice), but I was stressed 24/7, my safety was threatened by the thoughtlessness of several different people (all unrelated!) and I was angry. I was angry all the time.

I go to bed angry. I wake up angry. I calm down a tiny bit. Then various people interfere with my temporary peace, and I get more angry, again. By the time I go to bed I may feel the slightest bit better, or the cumulative effect could make me feel worse. Either way, I go to bed angry.

I've been like this for a while and I don't see an end. I wondered if it might be "me" and not "them." I got my hormones checked. They came back normal. "Are you under any stress?" the Doctors asked. "Yes" I answered. "Everyone is causing me stress! That's why I'm angry at them!" - Duh! ;)

I'd hoped hormones could be blamed for some of it. They can't. It's "them" and I'm not doing well with any of "them" right now. And I'm about to leave to take care of another one of "their" lives for a few weeks to try to get things in place for them to be more ok on their own so I can return to less contact, or at least a more comfortable level of contact for me.

I don't want to go. I don't want to do anything. I want everybody to be able to take care of themselves. I hate everybody. "Oh you don't really hate them" would not be accurate. I do. It's not love that I feel. It's pity. Responsibility. "Moral rightness." "Shoulds." It makes me sad.

People don't change. But some get more manipulative. Some more vulnerable. Some more manipulative and more vulnerable. I don't know what to do with that. It's easier on my mind to help than to pretend I don't see. But it's not easy. I would be all right if these people never contacted me again - if they were ok. I don't want them lying in a street somewhere or being abused in some facility. I don't (usually) wish them ill. I wish them independence and in another world. No contact. No photos. No accidental meetings or 2nd or 3rd hand information from others. Living in a nice little house on a hill, with a white picket fence, in a bubble that doesn't go near my world. I want that.

I don't experience joy from anyone in my life right now. I experience some gratitude. Some immense gratitude and thankfulness from random acts of kindness I sometimes get from others. Always noticed. But no joy. Only anger, and more anger. I am angry, all the time.

Dessert Bar at Whole Foods

❤  Happy Valentine's Day  ❤

I'm tired of no snow

I am. I like snow. I want snow. Almost every time it's snowed in the past few years, I've been out of town, watching on TV, cursing my luck to be anywhere else but smack dab in the middle of a blizzard. This year I've been home at the right times, and there's been NO SNOW. (- Ok, there was about 2 days of a little bit of snow when I was flat on my back with the flu. Even with the flu I considered going out, but my lungs had other plans!)

I'm giving up on snow. It's late. We're almost at mid February. I know there could be snow as late as March, but I'll be away again soon, and all extended forecasts show NO SNOW on the horizon. Maybe it'll come while I'm away. Maybe it'll snow when I get back. THAT'S TOO FAR AWAY!

I like my current "Snow" blog template, but given the circumstances it feels off. I'm not eager for spring or summer, or for winter to be over. But if winter isn't even coming, then the whole "snow" thing seems out of sync. Every time I come here I think "Snow? There IS NO SNOW! :P " I feel like a kid waiting in a snowsuit in 60 degree weather.

I think I may switch back to my default Pink template. -Because it's more neutral for me and less emotionally charged! I could pretend it's pink for Valentine's Day and maybe add a heart or two, but the real reason will be because it's not snowing, there's been no snow, it's not going to snow, and I'm moving on! :P


Edit: And done! Credits at the very bottom of the blog (where they always are.)

Engrish is a site about unfortunate translation errors. When I need a laugh, I go there and read a minimum of 4 pages. - It always works.

Today I got through the first page with only a few minor chuckles. Then I read the Batman Begins Playing Card (below) and that did it for me. Maybe because I recently watched this movie (twice!) and totally missed this part of the plot ;)

* For those of you who've never seen the film, "Batman Begins" is about how Batman came to be. Bruce Wayne's parents were murdered in front of him when he was around 10 years old. He grew up wanting revenge and eventually became a vigilante. The movie shows how he learned all his cool stunts (from Ninjas), where his gadgets, car, and costume came from, why he decided to use the symbol of a bat, and how he came to use the basement under his mansion. That's the movie I saw. But, like I said, it seems I missed something... (Click the picture to read, and don't give up halfway. You'll miss it ;) )

Photo courtesy of

I haven't seen this room before

It looks bigger than the rooms I usually see.

Edit: This is "Kibo," the Japanese Experiment Module.

I haven't watched the Space Station very much these past few months. (- I was away... then I was sick...) I think I may start watching it more again. For some reason, it brings me a great sense of peace. I'm not sure why. Maybe because it seems so unreal, and yet, it is real. I think I need that in my life in some ways. For more [good] unreal things to be real.